I think about the future...

a lot these days, I've always been a person with an eye to the horizon. I often feel that if I have a goal then I have life, movement and possibility. Yet there's a difficulty in that.

I still haven't developed the ability to know the moments along the way. I suppose on one hand this helps to avoid pain. Why "live in the moment" if that moment is awful? But the side affect of that medication is a diminished ability to live in the joy of any given moment as well.

It seems they come together, to pause on the speeding train to the future means you must risk being in the moment however it presents itself. I would like the moments of joy to be forever and the moments of struggle and pain to last less then a second but to be open to one is to be open to all.

Perhaps the key is Faith, the ability to observe, or at least accept the possibility of, the hand of God in all things. Its not Faith as a kind of anesthesia but rather Faith as a framework, an interpretive grid. When the moments, good or ill, cause you to pause on the run to eternity Faith allows you to make sense of them, find their balance, or at least endure.